Don't fight it

In life, I tend towards introspection. I often examine what I'm feeling, and why. Actually, I probably tend to over-examine. Perhaps it's a sign of some solipsistic tendencies, but I can only be sure of what I feel, so I spend a lot of time dwelling on that.

Yesterday, I had a sudden rush of "I'm back!". I was putzing around over the weekend, and decided to try shaming myself back into studying Portuguese by changing my gmail language setting to Brazilian Portuguese. Then I changed my whole computer's setting to the same. I came in to work yesterday and still felt pretty happy about making that small change, so I switched my phone to ptbr as well. Riding high on this wave of pseudo-accomplishment, I actually studied some Portuguese, if only to be able to pronounce the new words I was exposing myself to. Since I was actually putting in some time on a language-learning website, I checked out their Japanese section and did some studying there, too. Later, when a coworker asked if I felt like doing some stickfighting, I jumped at the chance.

This morning, after nearly two weeks off, I made sure to get my morning workout in. I lost a bit of progress, only managing 55 two-handed ghetobell swings in the first set, but I finished off with a bunch of rack and press of the 40lb kettlebell.

I don't know exactly what got me all motivated to get things going again. Normally, I'd push and prod at myself and try to figure out why I'm doing this, where the motivation came from. I'd look at it and see if it was likely to last or if it's just some weird momentary blip. This time, though, I think I'm just going to shut my inner analyst up and see where this takes me. There's no need to fight so hard when things are going your way. I'll save that energy for when the tide ebbs.